5 Steps to Clearing Clutter

We are realizing how little we actually need in the physical world and turning more to the simple pleasures in life. Furthermore, it simply doesn’t feel good to be in our living space if it is filled with items that we no longer need. And, for good reason. Anything in your space that you no longer use or love is simply taking up space for something else to come into your life.

Feng Shui is based on harmonizing the free flow of energy, or chi, in living spaces. If the flow is restricted, then it becomes stagnant. By keeping your spaces clutter-free, you are not only allowing the free flow of energy, but you are also removing stagnant energy that was created by that clutter giving yourself new opportunities in your life. Clutter is anything that you are keeping that stagnates your energy because it serves no purpose in your life.

Clearing clutter can evoke feelings that range from overwhelment to bliss.  For those who feel overwhelmed by the idea of clearing clutter it is best to start with small, achievable spaces even if that simply means cleaning out a drawer.  Once you’ve attained that goal, you will be more inspired to keep going.

The following are the 5 steps to clear clutter from any space:

1.  Set Aside Time
For many, clearing clutter can be overwhelming which is why it has accumulated to begin with. We put it off and just let stuff collect. So the first step of clearing clutter is to make time for it. Make it a priority. To do this, create a block of time out of your schedule. For example, take a day off from work or carve out an afternoon or simply designate the next 30 minutes for clearing clutter. The point is consciously making time knowing that this is important for your well-being.

Again, if clearing clutter seems especially daunting to you, then break down the job into small tasks. Do one box, drawer, or closet at a time.

2.  Have Materials On Hand
Make sure you have boxes and/or plastic bags, recycling bin, and garbage bags on hand. Also Sharpies are great to label boxes. This step is important because you don’t want to clear one closet just to shift it all to another closet. While you are clearing, you want to be able to immediately place the item into its destination to reduce any further clutter.

You will want to sort the items accordingly: trash, recycling, returns (all those things that you’ve borrowed over time and not returned), donation, for sale, and an undecided pile. For trash items, place in trash bags. For recycling items, place in recycling container immediately. For returns, place in a designated box. For items that will be donated, place in an appropriate bag or box for immediate delivery.

For the items you have designated for sale — whether it be for a garage sale, craigslist, or ebay — make sure the item is worth your time to sell. Make sure you are not using the “for sale” items as a way to distract yourself into keeping it. For items in the undecided pile, keep reading…

3.  To Keep or Not to Keep
Knowing what to keep and what to get rid of is the quintessential question of clearing clutter. In determining what to keep, ask yourself the following questions:

Do I use it?

Do I love it?

If the answer is “No” to both, then it goes. You should love or lovingly use everything in your home. If you don’t, it is taking up valuable space.

4.  Final Decision
For those items that you either can’t make your mind about or just can’t part with, then ask yourself why? You will find a deeper meaning. And perhaps then you will be able to part with it. If not, then save it for the next round of clearing clutter. The emotional weight will eventually get to you. Just like everything in life, we hold on to it until it becomes easier not to.

Each time you clear clutter you will be amazed at how much easier it gets and how much more you can part with. In fact, it becomes extremely freeing. When you successfully do it once, you realize life really does continue without that item(s).

5.  Delivery Time
This step is as crucial as the first step. There is no point in going through your items, just to put them in a box in your closet. Instead, immediately take the trash out. Recycle items. Deliver the donation items within 24 hours, along with any items to be returned. Begin the process for selling the items to be sold. This step can be more time consuming than you think, so build in plenty of time for properly disposing of your items. This last step can be the most annoying, but also the most therapeutic. Once you have properly rid of the items you will feel so much lighter.
AND one of the biggest payoffs from clearing clutter is that you will be so much less likely to accumulate clutter in the future.

photo credit

What To Do With Childhood Memorabilia?

This is a question I invariably get every time I speak about clutter clearing. So often parents of adult (or almost adult children) want to know, “what do I do with all of the crayon masterpieces my child made in kindergarten.” They are so conflicted. On the one hand, there are closets full of these that are just collecting dust and taking up valuable space, but on the other hand it just seems criminal to get rid of them. What to do?

First off, you may be asking, “why do I even need to get rid of these items?” You wouldn’t be reading this article if in some way they weren’t weighing you down. Keeping a lot of memorabilia – be it our own or our children’s – can physically and energetically weigh you down. Having lots of stuff can literally prevent people from moving to another location – one in which they would probably be happier. Secondly, it locks you into the past.

Hanging on to lots of memorabilia prevents you from moving forward or even being present in your current life. It oftentimes prevents mothers from finding their life after being a mother. So what do you do with all the memorabilia?

Step 1: Have your adult children go through the memorabilia to see what they want to keep. After all, it’s their stuff. It’s their crayoned artwork, their graduation cap, and their mood ring. In fact, when you originally kept it, you were probably keeping it “in case” they wanted it one day. Give them the right of first refusal and have them take ownership of what they want to keep. Chances are they won’t want much of it. That is, unless you are offering to store it for them (not recommended). In which case, they will want to keep more of it. Trust me. If your children are not adults yet without enough hindsight to what they will want to keep, then gather all of the memorabilia and store it in organized containers until they are old enough to go through it. At that point, refer to Step 1.

Step 2: After your children have taken what they want, then the rest is yours. This may vary from rooms full of stuff to a file folder. Everyone is different in the amount they accumulate and therefore with the amount you want to keep or get rid of. My advice is to pick a target container size for what you want to keep. Your target size may be a file folder, a small storage bin, a large Rubbermaid bin, a closet, or even a room. Decide what is best for you. So, for example, if you select a large Rubbermaid bin, select your favorite items until the bin is full. And that’s it. Clear out the remaining items.

Step 3: Some people suggest taking photos of memorabilia items and then dispose of them. If this appeals to you, then this could certainly lighten your load. If so, perhaps you won’t have to store anything or at least not as much. For me, I would rather hang on to a few items than have a bunch of pictures. With a picture you don’t get the sensory experiences of touch and smell that you get with the actual item. When I come across my baby blanket in my Rubbermaid, it’s as if I am transported back in time. That being said, my life is just as rich with or without keeping my baby blanket. So perhaps it’s time to let it go! Your thoughts?

Feng Shui iPhone App is Here!

First off, I love my iPhone. I love the idea of apps and many have even changed the way I function on a daily basis. On several occasions, I will flip through the Feng Shui apps always surprised to find that none of them are all that functional, particularly with using the Bagua Map. So while sitting under the Blue Moon on New Year’s Eve, the idea, design, and inspiration came to me to develop my own. Within minutes, I sketched out my idea and two months later it is now available.

Similar to my book to be released April 25^th, 27 Things to Feng Shui Your Home, my goal with this app was to make it simple but informative. The number one thing I hear from clients is that Feng Shui books are confusing. And, yes, I agree. It can be challenging to understand Eastern concepts, particularly when written from an Eastern mindset.

This app is based on the most widely used westernized Feng Shui method, including the Black Hat or BTB Feng Shui method. Accordingly, the Bagua Map is aligned per the front door of the space, not per compass directions.

With this app you will have all the information you need to use the Bagua Map. And what I love about apps is that they are interactive!

FEATURES

• The Bagua Map can be viewed in Portrait or Landscape mode depending on the general shape of the space you want to feng shui.
• Click on each square of the Bagua Map to get all the information you need on that section of your house.
• Provides in-depth characteristics, application, remedies, and enhancements for each quadrant.
• Import or take a picture or sketch of your floor plan, room, etc. from your camera photos and superimpose the Bagua Map onto it for a bird’s eye view.
• Save your feng shui-ed floor plan and create as many as you want.

HOW TO USE

• Align the main front door of your house with the bottom of the Bagua Map screen where it says “front entrance.”
• If your front door is centered on your house, you will be walking in the Career & Life Purpose square. If the door is off-centered to the left, then you will enter through the Wisdom & Self-Awareness section. If the door is off-centered to the right, then you will enter through the Helpful People & Travel section.
• To feng shui an individual room, you will align the Bagua Map with the door entering the room with the “front entrance”. For example, the farthest, left corner of the room from the door will be the Wealth section.
• To feng shui a desk, where you are sitting is equivalent to the “front door,” which in most cases will be centered at the Career & Life Purpose section. For example, the farthest, left corner of your desk is the Wealth section.

To link to your iTunes store to download, click here! Or to find in the app store on your iPhone, just Search “bagua map” or “Tisha”.

I would love to hear your feedback!

7 Benefits of Practicing Detachment from s.t.u.f.f.

This is a post from Good Life Zen by Tony Teegarden. Tony blogs at tonyteegarden.com where he delves into Human SEO (Self Exploration Optimization).

Consider for a moment, what it means to live a life of detachment and what comes to your mind first? Ask yourself what do you feel at first thought?

Do you interpret detachment to mean you are disconnected from:

• people
  
• relationships
  
• your emotions
  
• society
  
• physical stuff
  

It’s important to measure and understand what your current belief around the idea of detachment is before you move forward with this post. Your attachment or belief around a particular definition is what ties your emotions to that particular event. Thus causing an experiencewhether good or bad.

So what is S.T.U.F.F.? I define stuff as, Scarcity That Undermines Freedom & Family.

I find it’s not so much the stuff that we accumulate that binds us, but the mental and emotional attachment surrounding the stuff that can cause us suffering such as our lack of emotional freedom and deeper connections with people.

Scarcity is a powerful human emotion that can hold us prisoner if we’re not aware of it. Our attachment to stuff is a form of scarcity that can effect our relationship with not only others but ourselves.

So what happens when you and I release any attachment to stuff and allow ourselves to live in the here and now, without scarcity on our minds? I call it emotional freedom and the opportunity to find or live our purpose. Remember the movie Pursuit of Happiness? It wasn’t called the pursuit of stuff was it? This is a form of detachment I’m going to cover.

practicing detachment

Now I’m the first to admit I like nice stuff. I admit I have a bit of a man crush on a Bentley GT Coupé, however I don’t have an emotional attachment to the car. I simply have an appreciation for the car as I would an amazing sunset. I have the exact same appreciation of those sunsets. It’s crazy to think I’d ever actually own a sunset isn’t it? Imagine if I had an emotional attachment to the sunset? Every time the sun went down I’d be a basket case. That would be pretty nuts of me, right?

Consider your same appreciation with physical stuff in your life and imagine not being so attached to it.

You can practice detachment through meditation where you find your connection within to all that is through out. For me this anchors me in my emotional freedom. It grounds me and I realize I don’t need stuff, I just like the experiences the stuff can provide. There are other ways you can practice detachment in your life. Some small and some may seem big.

“It’s not what I’m willing to learn or gain that will move me where I want to be, but what I’m willing to let go of that will allow me the freedom to be what I am.”

I got rid of traditional TV & cable going on 2 years ago now. I was willing to let go of my emotional connection to it and release it. Many people couldn’t imagine living without their TV shows however I can’t imagine wasting that much time watching them anymore. The mental clutter that it seemed to cause was only apparent after I stopped the steady diet of it.

For example: The attachment to be in front of the TV set at a particular time and night of the week was a small freedom unto itself. When I realized I didn’t require the distraction anymore I felt an emotional freedom which felt much better than the comfort of sitting in a chair and vegging out. I still enjoy a good movie night by all means. I’m not saying entertainment isn’t important however the steady diet of TV, like food or drugs, can be and usually is abused.

When you find yourself using something like TV as a distraction it’s time to detach yourself from it. Be aware of the scarcity that comes up, be mindful of it and gently send it on it’s way.

the 7 benefits of practicing detachment from s.t.u.f.f.

1. Loving-Can there but a better result of detachment? Can you imagine the families that have argued over the stuff of loved ones who have passed away? Can you imagine the deeper connections and love that could be replaced if everyone practiced detachment of stuff? Or what about the father who spends too much time at the office away from his family because he’s attempting to create more stuff in their lives? I remember hearing you can always get more money but you can’t more time. Love while you can.
   
2. Laughing-Imagine if you were to play more games together with your spouse or family, or play in home karaoke, or charades? Go for more walks after work or play in the park with the family? Could laughter ensue? Of course it could! If you give it the space to flourish, your bound to have fun. The emotional freedom allows for so much more laughter.
   
3. Connection-Consider the ability to connect with more people and create deeper friendships. I can’t tell you how many times when I’ve broken out of my routine I’ve ended up meeting someone or a group of people that I’ve had an awesome connection with. New can be scary to some personalities but connection is something everyone wants. Give yourself the room to experience it.
   
4. New Experiences-I’m not saying you have to go out and bungee jump or go skydiving (Which I’ve done and it totally rocks) but think about this for a moment. You don’t want the stuff really. You want the new experiences that stuff provides you. That’s ok, when detaching from the pursuit of stuff you’re able to enjoy the ride along the way and yes you’ll probably end up with stuff anyway but without the attachment to it. Identify the experience you want to have and realize the stuff is just a means to the new experience.
   
5. Emotional Freedom-This is a place of zero state for me. It’s where some of my best creativity comes. Because I continue poor out I have more room to receive in. It has taken much work to be here but the work is worth it. This is really the result I believe more people desire, not the stuff in their life but the freedom.
   
6. Harmonious Living-Have you had one of those days where everything just seemed to go right? Where your relationships just seem to be in a great place? This very well can be a result of detachment of expectation and just being.
   
7. Healthy Body & Mind-It may go without being said that with the emotional baggage many carry around this has a huge effect on peoples health. What happens to the mind has an effect on the body. When you release this energy and release the attachment to stuff you experience the emotional freedom you really want. That’s the experience you really desire. This is the place where you start to nurture your body because your mind is released fromstuff.
   

So ask yourself what you’d be willing to detach yourself from, even if for a short while, to test the emotional freedom waters. If you have family share with them what you’re desired outcomes are, like the 7 outcomes above, and I’ll bet you can get their buy in. Image how cool that would be.

What Do Avatar and Feng Shui Have in Common?

First off, if you have not seen this movie, go see it… if not for the stunning 3D effects, then for the beautiful message it conveys.

Briefly, here is a plot recap…The scenario is set in the year 2154. Most of the natural resources on Earth have been depleted through excessive and ruthless exploitation. A mission is set to use military force to conquer Pandora to acquire a unique mineral that is desperately needed on Earth. Pandora is inhabited by a wise, peaceful, and nature-loving blue skinned beings who call themselves the Na’vi. They are warriors and ready to protect their habitat. They understand and respect their connection with nature and worship a pantheistic deity they call Eywa.

The Na’vi are an indigenous species who not only understand but embody the meaning of the interconnectedness of everything. Their habitat on Pandora is simply breathtaking with the Hometree being their primary residence. The Na’vi truly live in harmony with all the energies of Nature… from the ‘deadly’ animals to the beautiful fauna. They understand that everything contains the Whole and is, at the same time, an inherent part of it. The Na’vi have the ability to transcend their individuality and see themselves as inherent elements of a bigger structure- the all encompassing global Consciousness.

Living in harmony with the earth’s energy is the cornerstone and entire purpose of Feng Shui. And, yes, we can all have our own Hometree. And, yes, we can (and many people already do and are) experience and live by the interconnectedness of all energy. Although we don’t live outdoors in a jungle, our home can be just as interconnected as the Na’vi’s Hometree. There is energy running through every piece of furniture and component of your home, not to mention your pets, the birds and squirrels outside, and, yes, your neighbors.

Pandora is not a fantasy but a reality that is present right now. We need only to stop, be still, and feel. In the movie, they used their tails as their feeling source. Although we don’t have tails, we do have the ability to tune in and feel the energy of everything around us. This movie just gave us the visual of how energy works. My favorite part of the movie was when Jake went to pray to their god(dess) Eywa to stop the invasion, Neytiri said to him,

“She protects the balance of ALL life.”

In other words, she takes no sides but instead protects the balance of life. And so is true with Mother Earth. We live on a Planet and in a Universe that is constantly making adjustments, sometimes minor and other times major, to maintain an energetic balance. This balance of energy trickles down to each one of us as we seek to balance our own personal energy. And like the Hometree, we need to protect and maintain the balance of energy within our part of the Earth that we inhabit… our home. This is Feng Shui.

What was your favorite part?

Being Happy: How Not to Love Stuff

 

The following is a repost from the blog of Life Optimizer…Thank you!  I couldn’t agree more and I couldn’t have said it better… especially around the holidays!

Do you want to live a happy life? I’ve written before about being happy, but here I want to take a different angle and look at one important cause of unhappiness: loving stuff. Many people try to fill the void within them by buying more and more things they don’t need. When new gadgets come out, they buy them. When their friend has a new car, they want it too.

But why does it happen? Why do people love stuff? The reason is they believe it will make them happy. They believe the more stuff they have, the happier they will be. Is that true?

The answer is no. Perhaps they think they are happy, but they can actually be much happier if they do it differently. This isn’t just my opinion; scientific research supports it. I will discuss it more thoroughly below, but first let’s see some disadvantages of loving stuff:

1. It makes your life cluttered. Each thing you have consumes not only your physical space but also your mental space. Acquiring one more thing means having one more thing to worry about.
2. It creates wasteful spending. Buying stuff you don’t need means spending your money unnecessarily. Wouldn’t it be better if you spend it on something that’s truly useful and meaningful?
3. It promotes materialistic point of view. The more you love stuff, the more you send the wrong message to the world. The message you’re sending is that stuff can give you happiness. As a result, more and more people around you will fall into it.
4. It isn’t a good way to make you happy. There are better ways for that. More about it below.

So what should we do? Here are some tips on how not to love stuff:

1. Realize the negative side of stuff

When you realize the negative side of stuff (as discussed above), you will think twice before introducing more clutter into your life.

2. Realize that experiences – not stuff – contribute more to happiness

Instead of buying stuff, use your money to buy experiences. Research shows that experiences contribute more to happiness:

Another theme that has emerged in similar research is that money spent on experiences – vacations or theater tickets or meals out – makes you happier than money spent on material goods… “We generally found very consistent evidence that experiences made people happier than material possessions they had invested in,” says Van Boven.

3. Avoid impulse buying

Impulse buying is one of the main causes of acquiring too much stuff. This is something I learn firsthand. Since I love reading, I used to buy a lot of books. And guess what? Many of them end up unread. Realizing this, in recent years I become more careful when it comes to buying books. I only buy books that I’m sure I will read.

The way I avoid impulse buying is by first putting the item I want to buy into a wish list. I then wait for at least one month and see if I still want to buy it. In many cases, an item could stay in my wish list for months before I buy it.

4. Think ROI

ROI (return on investment) is a useful concept to help you minimize the number of stuff in your life. When you buy something, think of it as an investment. The question is: can you get good return on your investment? The return here isn’t financial. It’s the overall value you get from the stuff. Will it make your life considerably better? Will it give you long-term happiness? Invest your money only on things that give you good ROI.

5. Give

Giving is the ultimate way to both avoid loving stuff and make you happier. Research clearly shows the power of giving:

First, they surveyed 632 Americans on their general happiness, along with what they spent their money on, and found that higher “prosocial spending” – gifts for others and donations to charity – was indeed correlated with higher self-reported happiness. They followed this up with a more detailed look at 16 workers before and after they received a profit-sharing bonus from their company. They found that the only factor that reliably predicted which workers would be happy six to eight weeks after the bonus was their prosocial spending – the more money people spent on charity and gifts for others, the happier they were.

The conclusion of the research is clear:

Money makes you most happy if you don’t spend it on yourself.

Why You May Be Having a Sudden Urge to Declutter Your Home

 

If you’ve found yourself voraciously cleaning stuff out of your home lately, you’re not alone. Over the last few months, I have heard this repeatedly from friends and clients. There is an insatiable urge to clear things out of closets, basements, drawers, and in some cases, entire rooms. For many people, this urge is so pronounced and unlike anything ever experienced before. For those of you who are historically packrats, this feeling is very new and perhaps even confusing.

So what is going on? Afterall, it’s not even Spring!

 

Basically, we (in conjunction with Planet Earth) are going through a major purging. Looking at it in terms of the economic climate, we have all realized that we not only can live with less, but feel better with less. All of the stuff that we accumulated over the last couple of decades just doesn’t feel good anymore. Stuff feels like a big weight. Instead, space makes us feel good. We can breathe again (notice how your breath changes after you clear something out). This is all part of a return of living close and in harmony with the Earth, not in opposition like we as a collective have been doing. In fact, you may have noticed that when you are now drawn to purchase something, it is artisan-made, natural fibers, and/or organic products.

From a spiritual perspective, we have been and will continue to be (perhaps until 2012) on an accelerated course of evolution with this Summer (‘09) being in full force. As we evolve, we become less and less dense as different vibrations cannot co-exist. Matter is the highest form of density. Whereas, energy before it manifests into a physical form is a lighter density, but still some level of density. For example, a kidney stone would be emotional energy like anger that has manifested into a physical form. As we evolve, we purge this density (which could be the subject of numerous blog articles) on the physical, emotional, and mental levels. And, our home, which is an extension and reflection of ourself, needs to as well.

As you clean stuff out of your home, you are assisting in an important and necessary part of your spiritual growth, which is paramount to your physical and emotional well-being. You may even notice some resistance well up along the way. Be conscious and notice what the resistance is.

As you clean out your basement, you are cleaning out your subconscious mind. In other words, you are bringing things from the subconscious to the conscious mind in order to effectively deal with it and, if necessary, get rid of it. Prior to that, things were stuffed down there to avoid dealing with it or even having to see it.

What about closets? This is where we stuff things we don’t want others to see, perhaps including ourselves. As we clean out our closet, we are all “coming out of the closet” in some aspect. In your own unique way, it is allowing you to live more authentically. This again is a letting go or purging of anything dense, such as lies, fronts, and fakes. Even with regards to your clothing closet, perhaps there are clothes that no longer seem to fit who you are anymore.

We are all evolving to our highest vibration and most authentic selves, which is love. So, when you get the urge to purge your home, go with it.

Raising Your Energy Vibration Through Your Home

Making a House a Home for Children

We can all remember our childhood home. Whether you lived in several houses growing up or just one, there is always that one house that we consider home. It still holds our memories, emotions, and in some cases our DNA. It was the place we felt the safest in the world while experiencing the most important stages of development. Our childhood home often shows up in our dreams or may even be replicated as adults as we heal our childhood wounds.

Because of this strong connection, parents realize the importance of providing their children with a home in which they can grow, learn, and love. In doing so, there are some important considerations for making a house a home for children.

1. A Place for Nurturing
A home should feel safe. Feeling safe as a child can equate to feeling loved. Think back to when you were a child. What things do you remember providing comfort to you? What parts of the house did you gravitate to? What area do you remember the best family memories? Around the fireplace, next to the Christmas tree, or maybe in the kitchen?

A house will feel more nurturing to children if the parents’ bedroom is within a reasonable proximity. Children also love small spaces. So don’t be surprised to find your child in the closet or under the bed. Providing them with blankets and comforters is also nurturing. Having a comfortable bedroom is also important for a child to have a peaceful sleep. Use calming, soothing colors in the bedroom. Children usually have enough energy on their own without being more stimulated by having bright bedroom walls. Instead, make the bedroom a place for comfort and nurturing.

2. A Place for Creativity
Children are practically synonymous to creativity. Having an area of the house in which children can have the freedom to create and explore is important. Daydreaming and fantasizing are just as much about being creative as are drawing and playing. A child’s environment can promote or hinder this important stage of development. For example, having windows with pleasant views or a mural of the sky on their bedroom ceiling are examples of ways to enhance creativity. On the other hand, rooms with televisions and electronics can zap childrens’ creativity. Having lots of clutter, even if toys, can also block creativity. Once a child has outgrown certain toys, don’t keep them around. Donate them to keep clutter to a minimum.

Providing a place for drawing, painting, and other forms of self-expression are important. Oftentimes parents find these activities too messy and use schools as a forum for such activities. However, children oftentimes need the safety of expressing themselves at home. Art is also an important way to keep an open communication line between the parent and child. Children often use doing homework as a time for exploring creativity and socializing with family members. Allow them to use the kitchen or some other family space for doing homework.

3. A Place for Socializing
Our childhood home is the place where we learn how to be social. Even prior to entering school, we begin learning social skills by watching our parents interact with others. Socializing at home by having people over can be a completely different experience than having friends at school. Letting others into your home is a way for others to get to know you better while also learning to maintain certain boundaries. The home should therefore be kept presentable and clear of clutter so that children feel comfortable inviting friends over. Also allowing space for children to play, whether it be school friends or siblings is important. Designate spaces for play and spaces NOT for play. As you set boundaries, your children will learn to set healthy boundaries as well.

4. A Place for Identity
As important as having a space for socializing is having a space for alone time too. This is especially the case with adolescents when they are forming identity. According to Nashville child psychotherapist, Allison Edwards:

“bedrooms are havens for adolescents to explore their identity. If they are not able to adequately develop identity at this stage, then their development could be delayed resulting in them not knowing who they are in adulthood.”

This is why it is important to let adolescents explore phases. For example, allow them to personalize their space. This may be posters or art hanging, picking paint colors, or even selecting furniture. Allow them to have their space the way they like their space. Allow children the freedom to move furniture around, to create spaces within a space such as a fort, or even to decorate their own space. If it is possibly a quick phase then use double stick tape or have them help you paint.

Part of the identity forming stage is to have a private space where they can be alone or unbothered to allow for withdrawal. It is important for them to feel like they have control over some space and can determine who comes in and out. Allow your child alone time. This can be as nurturing as family time. If you are not sure what is “normal” during this phase, contact a child therapist to get more information.

Oftentimes during the identity formation phase, children or adolescents can become quite messy. Encourage them to clean their space. Use reward systems if necessary. A clean space will help them with homework and to see solutions to problems much clearer.

For children, the price tag of a house makes no difference. A child could be as happy living in a small house as a big house. The most important quality for a house to have for a child is the presence of human love. The best architecture and design is no replacement. That being said, children are quite intuitive and will often be attracted to the rooms with the best design or feng shui.

Once your child has a place for nurturing, creativity, socializing, and identity formation, then it’s time to incorporate some traditional Feng Shui techniques into their spaces as well where they can not only grow, but flourish.

photo credit

What Does Your Home Say About You?

 

By now we’ve all either heard or personally experienced that a messy home causes a scattered mind. Most of us can admit that when our home is in disorder, our life follows suit, or vice versa.
There is also a social stigma associated with a messy home. According to a study by the University of Texas, people who walk into a stranger’s house form surprisingly strong negative opinions about that person. In fact, the messiness of Michael Jackson’s home, i.e. Neverland, was used as evidence against him when he faced molestation charges. During the trial, the courtroom was presented video footage of Jackson’s home taken by police during a raid. 

Of particular interest of several reports was the lack of conventional order in his home.  CNN noted, “The video showed the house cluttered with shoe boxes, books and a variety of objects stacked on the floors.”  Agence France-Press reported that, “The overall image was a peculiar mix of ostentatious opulence and cluttered confusion.”  Almost as damning as finding pornographic magazines were the scattered shoeboxes.
Studies have also shown the effect of a messy home on children.

According to Pennsylvania State University, a study determined that “disorganized” homes tend to produce children with lower cognitive skills. 

 

But is it always a bad thing if your home is messy?

 

As someone who grew up in an orderly, organized, and clean home, it was second nature for me to keep my own home neat and clean. Perhaps even at times coming close to crossing the border into being OCD (obsessive-compulsive).

Over the years as my more artistic, right-brain side developed, my home became less orderly. My OCD-like qualities had definitely fallen away as my right and left brain came more into balance. My home naturally evolved into an artist’s canvas where I could express myself while maintaining a peace of mind. If you’ve ever been to an artist or musician’s home, you can see how a dominant right-brain home looks like (which might also explain the scattered shoe boxes at Neverland).
A challenge for all of us is to bring into balance our right and left brains. In doing so, our home will naturally come into balance as well.

The important point is to know what is “normal” for your home. In other words, if your home is more messy than usual, then be conscious of what is going on in your life. Accordingly, know that by cleaning your home, your life will become much clearer as well. On the other hand, if keeping your home sparkling clean to the point of squelching creativity or even deterring guests from coming over, then it may be time to enroll in a painting class or some other right-brain activity.
Find where your balance point is and change or fine-tune it when necessary. Ultimately, our home should be a creative, safe, warm, stimulating, peace-filled, sacred space.

photo by Johan Larsson

Why Your Home Needs a Space Clearing

Imagine an unseen world of energy in your home. Although not visible to most people, there is energy lingering throughout your home that affects you daily– physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Every object and, of course, person in your home has its own distinct energy field. So while your kitchen table isn’t conscious, it’s energy is still very much alive and emitting an energy field. And each time you sit down at that table, your energy field and its energy field converge and affect one another. In the book, Hidden Messages of Water, Masaru Emoto experiments with just this notion showing how the energy field of a glass of water is affected by loud music, words, love, etc.

In addition to objects in your home, the empty space, i.e. air, is all energy. This energy is also referred to as chi in Feng Shui. And how the chi flows through a space is the crux of Feng Shui.

What Makes Up the Energy In Your Home?

Emotions. As I mentioned, we humans also emit an energy field. And, unlike your kitchen table, we have a very powerful conscious and subconscious mind with which we think and feel. Thus, our energy field is much more complex. In fact, it is a blueprint, or hologram, of our physical, mental, and emotional body. As we feel angry, the emotion of anger is emitted from our energy field. If you feel loving, then that is emitted out. This is why it is so easy to pick up other people’s emotions just by being in the same room. The phrase, “you could cut the tension with a knife,” is a perfect example.

We have an array of emotions all of which carry a vibration. Some emotions have a slow rate of vibration, meaning the molecules are literally vibrating slowly. These emotions are thought of as “heavy.” And others, such as love and joy, are high vibrations and thought of as “light.” These heavy, slow vibrations can stagnate the energy flow in your home. And, if not cleared, it will attract more stagnation. In other words, when someone walks into that area, they will not feel good, either consciously or subconsciously. And, in fact, they will be more prone to feeling the low vibrations that initially caused the stagnation, just as one feels when an angry person walks into a room.

Objects. In addition to emitting their own energy field, objects also impact our subconscious mind. Every object in your home means something to you on some level. In other words, you have some mental or emotional attachment to the object, or else you would not have it. Whether it is a piece of art that you bought on a trip or a vase that you don’t really like but feel guilty for giving it away because your mother gave it to you…it means something to you. And every time your subconscious sees that object (which is probably daily), it attaches to that thought or emotion. Maybe it is a piece of furniture used solely for function, like your kitchen table. Each time you eat at it, you are appreciating its function. But what about if it has a wobbly leg? What do you feel towards it then?

Layout. The layout of your floor plan and furniture also affect the flow of chi in your home. Ideally, the energy should meander through the space. In other words, the floor plan and furniture should allow the energy to easily flow through the space. Factors include corners, sharp angles, openings from one room to another, and the amount of clutter.

Light. As we know, the light takes out the dark. The areas of natural light in your home will be less prone to stagnation. Conversely, those areas that do not get as much light will be more prone to stagnation, such as corners, closets, and areas hidden by furniture. That being said, it is possible to have too much natural light in a home causing an imbalance of chi. In other words, there can be too much yang energy. And too much yang energy makes it difficult to relax and/or quiet the mind. The opposite is true in areas of low, dim light.

Do I Need a Space Clearing?

For the most part, if you have never had your space cleared, then you most likely need to. If for no other reason, a space clearing is necessary to clear out the energy of previous owners. Yes, energy can stagnate for years! And, in fact, it can get stronger if the same energy is put into it. In my experience, I have yet to go to home that did not need to be cleared. I have one client who is very conscious of her home and clears it regularly. It was a delight to be in her space, except for one problem area due to the floor plan.

Another reason to clear your home is to dismantle old patterns. Like our body, our home contains our mental and emotional patterns. If you want to make changes in your life, start or, at least, include the home. We spend lots of time and money on self-help methods for ourselves. But it we continue to live and breathe the same patterns in our home day after day, it is difficult to make any permanent change in our lives.

For information on having your space professionally cleared, visit www.mindbodyhome.net

Coming Soon: How to Clear Your Space!

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