7 Benefits of Practicing Detachment from s.t.u.f.f.
This is a post from Good Life Zen by Tony Teegarden. Tony blogs at tonyteegarden.com where he delves into Human SEO (Self Exploration Optimization).
Consider for a moment, what it means to live a life of detachment and what comes to your mind first? Ask yourself what do you feel at first thought?
Do you interpret detachment to mean you are disconnected from:
- people
- relationships
- your emotions
- society
- physical stuff
It’s important to measure and understand what your current belief around the idea of detachment is before you move forward with this post. Your attachment or belief around a particular definition is what ties your emotions to that particular event. Thus causing an experiencewhether good or bad.
So what is S.T.U.F.F.? I define stuff as, Scarcity That Undermines Freedom & Family.
I find it’s not so much the stuff that we accumulate that binds us, but the mental and emotional attachment surrounding the stuff that can cause us suffering such as our lack of emotional freedom and deeper connections with people.
Scarcity is a powerful human emotion that can hold us prisoner if we’re not aware of it. Our attachment to stuff is a form of scarcity that can effect our relationship with not only others but ourselves.
So what happens when you and I release any attachment to stuff and allow ourselves to live in the here and now, without scarcity on our minds? I call it emotional freedom and the opportunity to find or live our purpose. Remember the movie Pursuit of Happiness? It wasn’t called the pursuit of stuff was it? This is a form of detachment I’m going to cover.
practicing detachment
Now I’m the first to admit I like nice stuff. I admit I have a bit of a man crush on a Bentley GT Coupé, however I don’t have an emotional attachment to the car. I simply have an appreciation for the car as I would an amazing sunset. I have the exact same appreciation of those sunsets. It’s crazy to think I’d ever actually own a sunset isn’t it? Imagine if I had an emotional attachment to the sunset? Every time the sun went down I’d be a basket case. That would be pretty nuts of me, right?
Consider your same appreciation with physical stuff in your life and imagine not being so attached to it.
You can practice detachment through meditation where you find your connection within to all that is through out. For me this anchors me in my emotional freedom. It grounds me and I realize I don’t need stuff, I just like the experiences the stuff can provide. There are other ways you can practice detachment in your life. Some small and some may seem big.
“It’s not what I’m willing to learn or gain that will move me where I want to be, but what I’m willing to let go of that will allow me the freedom to be what I am.”
I got rid of traditional TV & cable going on 2 years ago now. I was willing to let go of my emotional connection to it and release it. Many people couldn’t imagine living without their TV shows however I can’t imagine wasting that much time watching them anymore. The mental clutter that it seemed to cause was only apparent after I stopped the steady diet of it.
For example: The attachment to be in front of the TV set at a particular time and night of the week was a small freedom unto itself. When I realized I didn’t require the distraction anymore I felt an emotional freedom which felt much better than the comfort of sitting in a chair and vegging out. I still enjoy a good movie night by all means. I’m not saying entertainment isn’t important however the steady diet of TV, like food or drugs, can be and usually is abused.
When you find yourself using something like TV as a distraction it’s time to detach yourself from it. Be aware of the scarcity that comes up, be mindful of it and gently send it on it’s way.
the 7 benefits of practicing detachment from s.t.u.f.f.
- Loving-Can there but a better result of detachment? Can you imagine the families that have argued over the stuff of loved ones who have passed away? Can you imagine the deeper connections and love that could be replaced if everyone practiced detachment of stuff? Or what about the father who spends too much time at the office away from his family because he’s attempting to create more stuff in their lives? I remember hearing you can always get more money but you can’t more time. Love while you can.
- Laughing-Imagine if you were to play more games together with your spouse or family, or play in home karaoke, or charades? Go for more walks after work or play in the park with the family? Could laughter ensue? Of course it could! If you give it the space to flourish, your bound to have fun. The emotional freedom allows for so much more laughter.
- Connection-Consider the ability to connect with more people and create deeper friendships. I can’t tell you how many times when I’ve broken out of my routine I’ve ended up meeting someone or a group of people that I’ve had an awesome connection with. New can be scary to some personalities but connection is something everyone wants. Give yourself the room to experience it.
- New Experiences-I’m not saying you have to go out and bungee jump or go skydiving (Which I’ve done and it totally rocks) but think about this for a moment. You don’t want the stuff really. You want the new experiences that stuff provides you. That’s ok, when detaching from the pursuit of stuff you’re able to enjoy the ride along the way and yes you’ll probably end up with stuff anyway but without the attachment to it. Identify the experience you want to have and realize the stuff is just a means to the new experience.
- Emotional Freedom-This is a place of zero state for me. It’s where some of my best creativity comes. Because I continue poor out I have more room to receive in. It has taken much work to be here but the work is worth it. This is really the result I believe more people desire, not the stuff in their life but the freedom.
- Harmonious Living-Have you had one of those days where everything just seemed to go right? Where your relationships just seem to be in a great place? This very well can be a result of detachment of expectation and just being.
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Healthy Body & Mind-It may go without being said that with the emotional baggage many carry around this has a huge effect on peoples health. What happens to the mind has an effect on the body. When you release this energy and release the attachment to stuff you experience the emotional freedom you really want. That’s the experience you really desire. This is the place where you start to nurture your body because your mind is released fromstuff.
So ask yourself what you’d be willing to detach yourself from, even if for a short while, to test the emotional freedom waters. If you have family share with them what you’re desired outcomes are, like the 7 outcomes above, and I’ll bet you can get their buy in. Image how cool that would be.
Healing Secrets With Deepak Chopra: Spirit and Healing
The Practical No-Nonsense Guide to Meditation
If you’ve thought about starting a meditation practice or tried to meditate and gave up, then this is the article for you. I went from being a left-brained business-minded attorney to a right-brained healer with meditation being my bridge. However, when I first started attempting to meditate, I found it extremely frustrating. That is, if I was able to sit there more than 10 minutes without my back hurting or my legs falling asleep. What most people do not realize is that meditation is an art. And all arts take practice. Saying that “I just can’t meditate” or “meditation doesn’t come natural for me” is like saying “I can’t draw” or “I have no artistic talent.” Sure, there are those people who are naturals at drawing, painting, playing a musical instrument, but most artists have learned techniques and practiced them over and over. They have practiced their art. And so it is with meditation. It takes practice.
You may ask why then should I put in the time to practice this art? Countless studies have shown that meditation has both short- and long-term benefits to brain structure and function. Specifically, the insula which connects the emotional center and thinking center, along with the amygdala, which is tied to the fight-or-flight impulses, actually change in form. Thus, meditators are more aware of what’s going on in their environment and thus more in control of their responses. Translation: People who meditate deal with stress much better and thus have fewer stress-related illnesses. Changing brain structure certainly does not happen overnight. It happens gradually over time after much practice.
Once you’ve made a decision to start practicing meditation, the first step is to designate a space. For tips on setting up a meditation space in your home, read 4 Steps to Create Your Personal Sanctuary. Having a designated space is, in my opinion, crucial. Ask any artist. They will tell you that a designated space to paint, write, cook, etc. is a necessity. The size of the space is not important, but privacy is. If you are unable to close off the space, then using a decorative screen to create a boundary is an option.
The next step is how to sit. This may seem pretty straight-forward unless and until you’ve tried it. Sitting cross-legged on a meditation cushion or folded yoga blanket(s) is the most common “seat” for meditation. If you find that your back starts to hurt, then start out sitting against a wall or in an upright chair. If you can sit cross-legged with not much problem, I would recommend using a meditation cushion to prevent your legs from losing circulation and falling asleep. For me, I had been doing yoga for years which is a great preparation for meditation. (In fact, yoga was originally used for preparing for yoga by the ancient yogis.) Even so, it took me about 6 months until I could sit for 30 minutes without my back hurting. There are “meditation muscles” in your back that most likely have been dormant. So make as many adjustments as you need. You don’t need to sit like a monk in Tibet. But you do want your spine upright.
Once you have your space with a comfortable sitting position, the next step is the actual meditation. For any first-time meditator I recommend to start out listening to a guided meditation or meditation music using headphones (the bigger the better). Headphones not only help block out noises but create an inward world where it’s just you. In other words, your attention turns from the external world to your internal world. There are countless options for guided meditation. I am particularly picky about the guide’s voice and my personal preference is Deepak Chopra. So before you purchase something, listen to a sample to make sure you find the voice soothing and not annoying. As for meditation music, I prefer the technological entrainments that help balance the right and left brain. Anything with sudden noises, such as birds, cricket and thunder, I find very disruptive.
Whether you use a guided meditation, music, or go it alone with silence, the most important tip I can share is contrary to what any meditation source will tell you: For the first 5 minutes, let your mind run wild! Let it go wherever it wants. Set it free. Instead of fighting it, just let it go. Your mind will feel like wild horses having been cooped up for years. Free them. You’ll be amazed at what might come up. For me, I might recall a dream I had the night before, remember that I was supposed to call someone, or think about what I want to do that day. Once you’ve given your mind 5 minutes to basically flood itself (use a timer if you feel like you might get carried away), start to rein it in. And then start to quieten your mind. It will not be nearly as resistant now.
From here, bringing your focus to your breath is a good starting place. For the breath is always there in repetition. Counting breaths can be very effective, i.e. Inhale One, Exhale One, Inhale Two, Exhale Two. Start out trying to do this for ten counts without thinking about anything else. Sound easy? Give it a try. You may be surprised. Once you can make it to ten, do it to twenty, and so on. You are controlling the mind instead of the mind controlling you. This is the part of meditation that will take the most practice. It’s the golf swing of meditation. Not thinking about anything!
Each time you can quieten the mind, it will be easier the next time. Let it gradually build up over time. For example, you may start out for 10 minutes the first week; 15 minutes the next week; and so forth. Set reasonable goals. Don’t expect to be a master after one week or even one month. It took me well over a year before I got to a place I felt comfortable with, which for me was sitting in meditation blissfully for 30-45 minutes. The work that you put into your practice will be mirrored in your daily life. You will automatically start living more and more in the present moment. And then one day when your mind is completely quiet, you realize through a deep and profound feeling of knowingness that you are not your mind, but spirit. And this, in my opinion, is the most important benefit of yoga.
photo by Alicepopkorn.
Om Sweet Om: Create a Sacred Space to Expand Your Yoga Practice
When runners want to take their training to a new level, they may purchase some new Asics or change up their running route. But how do yogis deepen their practice, chataranga after chataranga? Perhaps a new mat, a new instructor, or a new studio.
Instead, try creating a sacred space for doing yoga in your home – a sanctuary that you love to be in. In doing so, you will not only maintain enthusiasm for your yoga practice, but you will expand it to a new level.
By designating a space for a particular function, it is much easier to transition into that activity. So, with a designated yoga space you will be able to turn inward much easier each time you enter your sacred space. It’s similar to the automatic response your body gets when it hears the word ‘savasana’ in yoga.
On an energetic level, that space will carry the same energy which builds and builds over time allowing you to go deeper each time. It is no wonder that it is much easier to meditate in an ashram… the energy of meditators over years has built up to the point you can step in and immediately feel at peace.
Your sacred space can be any size — from the size of your yoga mat to an entire room. Choose this space carefully. Go around your home and find a space that feels good. Or find a section or a whole room that is not living up to its potential. I once had a guest bedroom that just collected clutter. Finally, one day I decided to reclaim this room. I turned lemons into lemonade.
With a new coat of paint, a serious detox of clutter, an altar, and a few personal items, this became not only my favourite room in the house, but a yoga and meditation sanctuary. Soon thereafter, my yoga practice went to a new level followed by teacher training. Within six months, I was teaching my first yoga class.
Although this article is about creating space in your home, it’s also about creating space in your yoga practice. It therefore can’t go without mentioning the benefits of having a home practice. This is where you begin to truly tune into what you want and need your yoga practice to be. You become your own inner guru, or upaguru in Sanskrit.
A home practice allows you to listen to what your body wants to do next. Maybe you are feeling energized and do an extensive series of warrior poses and arm balances. Or perhaps you are feeling tired and need to do slow and deep hip openers on the mat. A home practice also allows time for a longer meditation.
Most importantly, by integrating a home practice with attending classes, yoga will go from being an activity to a way of life.
Here are you few tips to create your sacred space:
1. Location
Again, size doesn’t matter. However, privacy does. Choose a place in your home where you will not be disturbed by people or pets. If it is a shared space with another person or activity, then using a partition or screen is recommended.
2. Clean and De-clutter
Once you have chosen your location, clear everything out of it and clean the area of any dust, dirt, or residue. Also clear it energetically with sage, or any other herbal cleanser of your choice, such as cedar or sweetgrass. A clear space is a clear mind.
3. Energize
Next determine what you want in your space; for example, a yoga mat, meditation cushion or chair, blankets, and/or props. If there is enough room, you may want some type of storage to keep the space clutter-free. Also, if space allows, an altar table, whether it is a cardboard box or an heirloom piece from India, is recommended. In other words, you want to have a centering piece. Make it an altar where only inspiring and precious objects are placed. If space doesn’t permit, then hang an inspiring picture instead.
4. Personalize
From here, add any items that reflect you and appeal to the five senses…
candles, incense, bells, gemstones, crystals, images, essential oils, affirmation cards, books, music.
5. Keep it Fresh
Once you have your sacred space, you want to keep it free of dust and clutter. Keep the energy clear and fresh. If you feel like your practice is in a rut, then change things around in your sacred space. Add a picture, change a picture, or add a new candle or gemstone. Avoid stagnation on any level.
Now it’s time to hit the mat… Namaste!
photo by Nessa Land.
Doing Less | Being More
It seems like lately everything I read stresses the importance of ‘being’. What used to be words of only the enlightened masters has crept into all areas, including the business world. The “do, do, do” mentality of the 80s and 90s has become “be, be, be” of the 2000s.
While I can sit and ‘be’ with the best of them, my practical, attorney side eventually rears its head saying, “with all this ‘being’, how do you ever get anything done?” And so I pondered this question.
On an energetic level, ‘doing’ is an active, masculine energy, while ‘being’ is a passive, feminine energy. Ultimately it is a balance (yin/yang) of these two energies that is optimal. As a society, we are needing to balance as a whole and thus more feminine energies are permeating up from Mother Earth.
Putting the energy stuff aside for a second, I started to think back at all of the most pivotal times in my life… people, jobs, and situations. I realized all of them just came to me or fell into my lap as opposed to my seeking it out.
Afterall, it is only when you are ‘being’ still that something can fall into your lap.”
Here is a personal example. Read more
4 Steps to Create Your Personal Sanctuary
With little to no movement in the real estate market these days, it is more and more apparent that we must make the best of the space we are currently in. And, in doing so, it is important to designate a space in your home for retreating, centering, and meditating. In other words, create a personal sanctuary.
This space can be any size — from a 2’ x 2’ corner to the size of your yoga mat to an entire room.
Designating this space for your personal use is important because each time you sit there, you automatically know that it’s time to go inward. It’s similar to the automatic response your body gets when it hears the word ‘savasana’ in yoga. At first, it’s just nice to have a place to retreat. Then, after a while, it becomes a necessary part of your day.
On an energetic level, that space will carry the same energy which builds and builds over time allowing you to go deeper each time. It is no wonder that it is much easier to meditate in an ashram… the energy of meditators over years has built up to the point you can step in and immediately feel peaceful.
Here are you few tips to create your personal sanctuary.
1. Location
Again, size doesn’t matter. However, privacy does. Choose a place in your home where you will not be disturbed by people or pets. If it is a shared space with another person or activity, then using a partition rug or screen is recommended.
2. Clean and De-clutter
Once you have chosen your location, clear everything out of it and clean the area of any dust, dirt, or residue. Also clear it energetically with sage, or any other herbal cleanser of your choice, such as cedar or sweetgrass. A clear space is a clear mind.
3. Energize
Next determine what you want in your space. Perhaps a yoga mat, meditation cushion or chair, blankets. Make it comfortable so that you will want to spend time there. An altar table, whether it is a cardboard box or an heirloom piece from India, is highly recommended. In other words, you want to have a centering piece. Make it an altar where only inspiring and precious objects are placed.
4. Personalize
From here, add any items that reflect you and appeal to the five senses…
candles, incense, bells, gemstones, crystals, images, essential oils, affirmation cards, books, music.
Once you have created your personal sanctuary, sit, relax, stretch, breathe, read, enjoy tea, meditate, or do anything that so inspires you. There are no rules!
